I should be there, but I don’t want to be there... BUT I should be there - Part 4

The conversation, went down like a turd being flushed down the toilet. I was rather confident, and started off asking, “What are Charlie’s beliefs?”. To this question, I got a few interesting answers, ranging from, “John Wayne, was the greatest American ever.” to “Coronation Street had gone downhill since Elsie Tanner had left the show”. My first thought was this was useless, and then I thought, at least I’d have something to talk about with him. Then I realised it was just the dragon’s acting, and so anything that I got from this, wouldn’t turn into any use. She waited for me to carry on.

I asked, “What are his religious beliefs?”. This got, “Well he quite likes Buddhism...”, which upset me a little, (Not like he liked Buddhism, but I was not structuring my questions, in a way that got the answer I required). 

 

I tried “Has Charlie got any hobbies?” I got a single answer, but I couldn’t use it. The answer was, “He likes drinking...”. This caused a attack on Charlie’s health care. “Could he have a tot of whiskey? It helps him sleep” was the first assault. Then came the traditional “friend” question, “A friend of mine, told me that he’d had a pint of Guinness, every day while he was in hospital, could Charlie?”. I sat there gob smacked, silent and thinking, “Don’t these people know, that alcohol put Charlie in here?”. It was after this that the dragon took pity, and told me that the whole thing was over.

She told me that nearly every nurse screwed up their first interviews, and that the whole secret was, “planning” and gave me a hand written list of things.

 

“1. Find out all you can about your patient’s health problem. This was detailed, and included what “he could have” and “couldn’t have”.

 

2. Remember, that even if you initially think the family members are “thick as pig shit”, remember that it’s their loved one in the ward, and they are carrying all the fears and worries with them, so they may not give clear answers... So clarify, and reassure and bloody care about these individuals.

 

3. The patients are not a list of symptoms. The patient is NOT the illness. You may find you can use certain symptoms and their effects on a patient, but remember EACH ARE INDIVIDUAL... and some may be able to deal with certain things, others not...

 

The list ran on, and the last read, “Most, if not all the patients on this ward are going to die. A lot know they’re going to die, and accept it, but it doesn’t mean you should feel sorry for them. Feel sorry in your own time, this is a happy ward, and it can be very rewarding, so smile you dumb shit, chat to the patients, and be caring.

Love Claire”.

 

So the Dragon was called Claire and she’d hand written the list the night before.

 

I decided I liked Claire.